Forgive me bloggers, for I have sinned. :(
I started out this weekend with my TOM. For some reason this one was a tough one for me emotionally, in fact I still feel out of it and it is come and gone. So unfortunately, I gave into my cravings and bought some doritos and oreos. In the past four weeks I have lost 4-5 pounds. When I weighed myself yesterday I had gained almost all of it back...now maybe thats from TOM, but I will have to give it a day or two to see. But I do know that some of it has to be from those oreos and doritos.
Part of me wants to just give up. I am comfortable with my weight, honestly. I am in a healthy weight, but I just wanted to lose a few pounds so I can be HAPPY and comfortable with my weight...does that make sense? I also want to get healthy so I can prepare my body for baby number two. I want to be able to work out while I am pregnant so I won't have this struggle next time. But a tiny part of me just wants to say, "oh, you'll be just fine..." which may be true, but it seems like the lazy way out to me.
I think today I am going to start counting those dreaded calories. I might even post my log on here...if I think you guys are reading it then it will make me feel accountable.I am trying to think about how it may take two months to see real results, like Nathalie said, but it is hard to keep that in mind.
Somedays I think this is all just too much hard work. I am sure you all feel that way sometimes, too. It is real hard to balance nutrition, working out, being a mom, cleaning, getting time for myself, working on my writing, working on my school work...and somedays I just think that I need to get rid of something. But it all seems pretty important to me.
I am going to finish my smoothie and take a jog-in-place.